“Surround yourself with people who make you happy. People who make you laugh, who help you when you’re in need. People who genuinely care. They are the ones worth keeping in your life. Everyone else is just passing through.” ― Karl Marx

If only we had the choice to make sure all around us are like the ones Marx talks about, life would be so much better. Until that happens, we make do with what we have, sometimes they are friends,sometimes they are strangers who just smile & make your day better and other times it is people you thought you did not care much for who surprise you with compassion & warmth.

Recently, while flying back from Kolkata, I experienced these 2 instances…

Instance 1
Had checked in and was wandering about near the shops and cafes, when I stopped at a bookstore outlet and was browsing through the books. The staff came up to me and asked if I wanted to leave my backpack near the billing counter? I smiled and gave it to him. It was then that I noticed 2 women standing near the entry pointing at me saying something. Ignoring them, I  walked along the aisle, towards the entrance and began browsing through the books there and that is when I heard them talking “If she can get clothes her size, am sure you will get in yours” said one lady to the other. They went on to talk about western clothes and how today the concept of sizes had changed, and again mentioned that I was wearing a Top and 3/4th which would not have been possible few years back. I looked up, met their eyes and smiled, before walking away towards the bill counter to take my bag and exit the space.

It is true right? These days we get clothes in all sizes, there are exclusive stores for plus size women where you arent made to feel like a  giant, and the clothes dont look like pillow cases. I love that I can go shop for readymades, which wasnt possible few years back.  I love that some stores have staff who are willing to spend time with you, to ensure you find clothes that fit you and that are quite stylish..

Now if only people and their mentalities changed…. The world should stop assuming a person  is big cos they eat a lot or giving out free advice on “go workout, try this try that..etc”  .. Sigh, wonder if that will happen in my lifetime!

Instance 2

I was waiting to board, and am usually in no hurry. I stand by allowing all those who think the flight is gonna leave them to get in & settle down. The only downside to this is that by the time I make it towards my row, there are people seated & i have to inconvenience them by asking them to get out while I get into my window seat.

And this time I noticed there was a gentleman sitting in the window seat. I told him it was my seat and asked him to move. He stared at me and said “oh just sit there, point to the middle/aisle, both of which were empty..”  I told him “no, i have specifically asked for the window seat” and requested he move..  He did get out, waiting for me to get into my seat and then sat in the aisle seat, mumbling how fat I was, a girl at that and why I couldn’t just sit in the aisle or middle seat [ and this he mumbled in Hindi].. Well, I not only heard him, I also understood. Took a second to calm down, catch a glimpse of the evening sky, before turning towards him and got his attention.

I told him I heard & understood what he had mumbled earlier and it wasn’t something I took lightly. He started shifting in his seat uncomfortably and tried smiling with a “oh no, I wasn’t mumbling, etc etc [in hindi]”.. I said “I don’t need explanation, and that I just wanted to let him know what he said/did was unacceptable.. Also told him I had infact politely requested he move from my window seat, and he should behave better~ With that I plugged in my headphones and got ready for take off.

As the plane landed, he had gotten up along with most others [ again, these are the folks who think they plane is gonna disappear if they don’t rush towards the exit] and I sat in my seat waiting, in no hurry! He had opened the overhead cabin to pull out his bag, looked at me and asked if he should get mine for me. I politely said thanked him & told him I shall get it when i alight, no hurry….

This is not the 1st time someone has commented in a different language about my size and I have had to tell them I heard and understood them. Why is it that people think they can say whatever they want and get away with it? Actually why is it that people have the need to comment at all? Why cant they just mind their own business~!!

Oh and before signing off, have you heard the “Fat so podcast? It is run by 2 women- Ameya & Pallavi, and quite interesting… https://www.sunoindia.in/fat-so/